Lying on your couch, wrapped in your arms, doing absolutely nothing.
If I can take a feeling with me, I choose this one. This feeling of pure contentment, completeness, happiness. We drift in and out of consciousness, short naps permeated with soft kisses and fading sunlight. The smell of your skin, the feel of it against mine… I feel more myself in this moment than any other – knowing that I am exactly where I’m supposed to be, comfortable with everything I am.
Here in this moment with you, I don’t feel like I have to be anything more than I am right now. I don’t feel like I need to have the answers to everything, or anything at all. I just know that I am safe, and happy, and loved, and that I could never ask for anything greater.
I love that we can do nothing together. We can sit side by side, you working on your computer and me working on mine. Or, more commonly, you working on your computer and me napping beside you. I love that we can go grocery shopping, clean together, do the most mundane of tasks but I’m never bored. I can never have enough of you.
I feel safe to laugh with you, I feel safe to cry with you, and I feel safe to be mad with you. I can finally completely let down my walls with you, let you in to see the good and the bad of me, the flaws and the insecurities, my fears and my traumas.
I can only hope that you feel the same way, that you can let me in as fully as I’ve let you in, that you feel as safe, and happy, and loved with me as I do with you.
Thirty Something 